Finding the Right Partner: Factors of a Successful Relationship

Finding the right person and long-term love isn't always a smooth or easy process. Those who keep an open mind and devote time and energy to dating don't necessarily achieve this quicker than the next person.

However, what often helps people find the right partner is sharing common values and interests. One key factor in finding a long-term partner and relationship success is whether that partner pushes you to grow and broaden your self-concept.

While humans can determine their attraction to someone in a fraction of a second, physical attraction doesn’t dictate lasting relationships. Instead, one's personality and healthy levels of emotional stability and agreeableness indicate long-term relationship satisfaction. Yet, these indicators are easier to see initially, whereas less-favorable traits of someone are not. While the signs could be apparent, people tend to ignore them at first. For this reason, it's important for people not to make long-term commitments until they face and resolve conflicts that inevitably arise over time.

No matter what, no relationship or human being is perfect, and there is no single indicator that signifies attraction nor long-term success. That said, the biggest struggle often occurs for those who believe there is a perfect person or soulmate out there for them. 

Those who have this mindset are more likely to end a relationship before working to resolve conflicts. For this reason, it is always best to have the mindset and understanding that relationships take work. And, to have a chance of success, you have to take a chance on someone and something that isn't "perfect" right out of the gate.

Diane K. Schmidt Counseling Services | 8575 W. 110th Street, Suite 304 Overland Park, KS 66210 | Phone: 913.730.6778 | Email: